Date Your Mate

This week I have been learning all about nurturing relationships. John Gottman stresses the importance of knowing your partners, what he calls, love maps. Basically it is knowing all the little things that make the person you love tick. Gottman said “The more you know about each others inner worlds, the more profound and rewarding your relationship will be.” In my own marriage I have found this to be so true. I think one of the best ways to learn each others love maps is by spending quality time together. I got to thinking about what the most fun dates I have ever had with my husband and here are the top 5 in no particular order.

1.     Several weeks ago we went to a fun restaurant (Culinary Dropout) in Tempe. We sat out on the patio and after our meal played corn hole that they had there. We had never done that before so it was fun being competitive and seeing each other in a different way. We then road bikes around Tempe Town Lake, and stopped and got the best ice cream sandwiches at Slickibles. It was a fun laid back day date.

2.     Soon after we got married I bought a long board because it was something my husband liked. One of my favorite dates was the first time we took them out around Tempe Town Lake. My husband loved teaching me how to do something he was passionate about.

3.     Another favorite type of date has been going to sporting events with my husbands. I don’t particularly love them but he does and it is fun watching him get joy out of it. We have been to Phoenix Suns games, Arizona Diamond Backs, and the Rattlers. When the game is slow it’s a great time to talk, and it’s great getting to see my husband in his element.

4.     One of my favorites was when we drove out to the desert and looked at the stars. We took a foam mat and laid their talking and laughing and eating snacks. We chose not to watch a movie and I am glad because we were able to learn about each other and just enjoy time together with out electronics.

5.     Last but not least is doing a session at the temple and going out to dinner after. After we do a session at the temple we always feel closer to each other and have the best dinners together. After drawing closer to God we always feel closer to each other.

After thinking about these dates I have realized that as time has gone on my husband and I have gotten better at going on dates but we still have a long way to go! We have recommitted to going on regular creative dates (not just a movie, even though that is our favorite). I encourage you to make the same commitment with your significant other! Keep your love maps and relationships strong, date your mate!